Flash of Silver…the leap that changed my world
Rite of Passage Three –No Longer Alone-
(11-12 years old)
Q. What do you remember most about the one you first felt the stirrings of attraction?
It has to be the most measurable of all human emotions –the day we first fell in love!
At 8-9 years old I wanted flaxen-haired Sylvia to see me in my new Scout hat –but this was altogether different.
Treena had tight curly black hair. I’m not sure how I described her to my parents at the time because words such as lovely or petite orbeautiful don’t trip easily from an eleven-year-old tongue. Yes, she was all of those superlatives rolled up in one attention getting young woman.
I fell hard. I couldn’t get her out of my mind.
Our hands eventually touched and quite simply I knew that I loved and was being loved.
All of this is sometimes called ‘calf love’ and may, in some cases, be remembered as a pre-hormone discovery that simply and sweetly begins to fade…taken over with stronger, more urgent, teenage passions.
Those early years formed every foundation and every deep relationship I’ve ever had. In one wonderful moment (as I describe in my book) I had become aware of going beyond myself in order to give my full (only child) affection to someone of my own age.
I never once forgot that amazing experience. It did fade for eight years, it did encounter competitive adolescence, but in time that too was vanquished and… Well now, that would we a spoiler wouldn’t it?
So…what about now?
My life is now awash with memories. The first hand experience of day-to-day life with a loved one is now over for me.
Treena began her ‘sleep’ just five days short of our 60th wedding anniversary on September 17, 2015
We were able to love each other right up to her last breath and even then, as I closed her lovely eyes and kissed her brow – I knew, not in a religious way, but deeply in my heart, that what we had shared, for a span of seventy-one years, had not ended and would never do so.
There were moments in our time together when passions raged, when love was wrenching and almost unbearable –beyond the ability to breathe.
No matter the intensity it came full circle back to the holding of eleven-year-old hands…such purity, such discovery, such absolute sweetness that now uplifts my lonely moments.
I do have a pretty long list of regrets when I could have done better but that too has been slowly covered with the “good soil” of wiser choices until they are scarcely even recognized.
I loved, was loved, and continued in that love for all but seventy-one years. I am, in short, a grateful man who shared a good life with an amazing woman…Treena, the love of my life.