Treena…the love of my life.

Oct 05, 2015

Treena…the love of my life.


TreenaA great many of you have been concerned about Treena and have reached out to me over the past two weeks with such loving kindness and support.

Let me put it in her words, because it is so much like her. “I am going to have tea and eggs with Jesus”.

At 2016 hours PST on 17 September 2015, she left with that intent.

A little background may help. Jesus said in Revelation 3:20

“Behold, I stand at the door and knock, if any ‘man’ hears my voice and opens the door I will come in and have ‘tea and eggs’ with her and she with me.” (TREENA’S version with, hopefully, the LORD’S permission)

As I write this it is almost two weeks since I find myself alone in almost exactly 60 years. I am now aware of how much of my thinking and caring life has been wrapped up in her.  I have loved this extraordinary woman since I was eleven years of age, when we met at school in England. There is very little to remember about my life that does not include her.

As a result there is a HUGE gap and a feeling of being ’empty’ and at the same time as though I am ‘falling’. Our shared faith allows me to prayerfully ask to be both ‘filled’ and ‘caught’.  For this to happen, I believe, will take time that cannot be rushed.

And so I wait in the strong belief that I too will see the ‘goodness of the Lord in the land of the living’.

The end of a life has a wonderful way of drawing attention to the issues that really matter to us as individual humans and to set aside things of mere passing distraction. I hope to be able to focus a good deal of my remaining life trying to understand how best to live beyond my own immediate self-interest. I do hope to do this in the company of others who feel, as Treena did, that this is a great need in our troubled world.

You are welcome to join me as I ‘blog’ my way upstream in search of resilience for all creation.

It’s a common good that we can do in common.

Thank you for your love…Upstreaming on purpose.



  1. sherry l bean Says: 4:41 pm

    Dear Graham, I am so sorry to hear of Treena,s passing over the rainbow bridge. I’m 75 and yours was the first cooking show I was hooked on. Have N enjoy your cook books. Your honesty in turning your life around has always been an inspiration to me. I was thrilled at finding you and Treena again. Looking forward to “knowing you again” as that’s how you always made me feel, like a friend. God bless you and your family. With. love. Sherry

  2. Deb and Bill R.. Says: 3:48 pm

    Our hearts go out to you, Graham. We are so sorry for your loss. We just stumbled upon your blog this evening. My husband had just prepared your delicious Spaghetti Carbonara from the Smart Cooking book. It was heavenly. We decided to look you up online to see what you’ve been up to. And then we read of Treena’s passing. We have never met but feel like we know you…the previously-mentioned book is well worn (the binding has finally broken) and deeply cherished. Every recipe has left a delicious memory for us. Our deepest sympathy. May God bless you.

  3. Mark W Says: 7:44 am

    Graham – another lifelong observer though we’ve never met. I’m so sorry to hear of Treena’s passing, though so glad (and even envious) that you have had such a full and vibrant life with your one true love. Most of us are not so fortunate – I’ve spent a great deal of my life alone but now, as the years pile up, have rediscovered a past love and will not be lonely again for the years that may remain. The life you and Treena had was truly grand, though, and even mere echoes of that will nourish your spirit in the days ahead.

  4. Roderick Kimball Says: 9:35 am

    I and my friends delighted in meeting both of you at the EG conference a couple of years ago. The connection between you has had a lasting impression on me as an ideal for the way people should be with each other.
    Love and Light,

  5. Leah Barnier Says: 9:39 am

    I gave Treena my coat at the Port Angeles Crab Festival a few years ago. It was a wicked cold day and she was turning blue.
    I will never forget the hug and heart felt words she had for me, even moving me to the head of the book signing line.
    She was a wonderful, warm person. I will never forget her.
    My thought are with you.

  6. Michael J. Hennessey Says: 4:32 pm

    My wife and I wish you well and have you in our prayers. We are one of the many people you have touched in your life. We live in Shelter Bay, La Conner. We are in the phone book. If you just need a place to get away but have someone around our door is always open.
    God Bless

  7. Daniel Comp Says: 9:21 am

    Treena redirected my life in many ways. I recall Graham laughingly poking at her as Florence Nightingale with an ax! I recall her laughing and directing and correcting with heartfelt care and intensity – and her hugs and tears will always be appreciated as I carry a baton forward. Thank you both for your investment and love.

  8. Jon Stevens Says: 3:41 am

    Dearest Graham:

    I look out my window this morning to see the morning star awaiting the arrival of the sun. Like that star, we all wait for that joyful day when we each will see the “Son” rise and it’s light will surround us. Treena’s light is now enveloped in the holy light of God. That, like the morning star after sunrise, we cannot see her or hear her or talk with her is painful to us but like that star, she is still there, in her rightful place, waiting for us to join her in that celestial song which is topped off by “tea and eggs with Jesus”.

    The fabric of your life, and ours, has been torn and a hole created by her departure. Jesus is standing by with needle and thread to mend it. I am praying daily for you, that as He does the darning you will discover the peace it brings. They say, “Nature abhors a vacuum.” It really is God who does not like empty space for He is all about relationships. No one can replace Treena. But until you are joined again, may God grant you so many more loving relationships you are glad to be alive with us.

    And may today bring you a soft landing in your fall and a light to read others by.

    Love always and forever from where ever I am,
    Your Friend,

  9. Terry Says: 12:09 am

    Dear Mr. Kerr. Your words are so touching. I am so saddened to hear about Treena. Because I am a Believer, I know that those that have gone before us are in a better place. It us we that remain that feel the loss of these vibrant souls. Your words describing this precious part of who you are serves as a tribute to the beautiful spirit of your wife, best friend and soulmate. I pray that God give you Peace as you move forward. There will be those “firsts” you must experience. There will be times you turn to talk to her or to pick up a phone to call. Sometimes these moments are heart wrenching but one day you will notice a ray of sun shining through the clouds. Or, you will hear the laughter of little children and for a moment the powerful sense if loss eases. Those moments are precious as life takes hold again. Never in the same way but in the way you already see. It is through helping others that we ourselves are helped. I will keep you and your family in prayer.

  10. Yolanda Olson Says: 11:58 pm

    You are beautiful writer. Thank You for sharing. I know the God of all comfort will be there for you when you need Him most. Great photo of Treena. Thank you for posting. We all know she loved you..

  11. Linda Forbes Says: 8:18 pm

    Hello Graham, I am so sorry you are without the love of your life. I met you and Treena in Meyers Chuck where you both climbed the ladder to my boys treehouse for breakfast. Later Treena sent me wonderful books of poetry. I have thought of you both, often, and how you enjoyed each other and took the time for others as well. We will pray God reveals more and more to you how to go forward…..
    Tea and eggs with Jesus – What a wonderful thought !!!

  12. Kathy Rice Says: 7:49 pm

    I am so sorry. While you know where she is and that you will be seeing her again, it is the time between that feels suddenly empty and seems to stretch to eternity itself. Praying for your fullness and safety net.

  13. Katherine Ewing Says: 7:34 pm

    Beautiful tribute to the poet-bride. Thanks for sharing this journey. The sadness of life without tre must be nearly unbearable. Please receive my prayers and best wishes. Fondly kitty

  14. Pat Hayes Says: 5:14 pm

    Dear Graham, Steve and I have had you in our thoughts and prayers as you find yourself walking without the love of you’re life! I see you at you’re desk looking out from the lookout of you’re home contemplating life and what that will look at walking with God! I’m confident that God holds your heart close to him and will walk with you and show you , and inspire new thoughts and dreams! God bless you Graham

  15. Hans-Gustav Schwartz Says: 3:59 pm

    Dear Graham

    Though we’ve never met, I’ve considered you a friend and someone I have looked up to for nearly fifty years. As a boy growing up in Southern California, you inspired a love of cooking within me that since that time I have tried to share with others. You’ve been a role model and an inspiration to me since you first galloped into my life so many years ago. Now my heart goes out to you at this critical point in your life. Would that I could inspire you and give you comfort as you have done for so many others. May God bless you and keep you well so that you may continue to share your love with the world.

  16. Annamaria Catanzaro Says: 3:18 pm

    You were a staple in my childhood home with my Mother watching your Galloping Gourmet show often. Then in my 20’s I found myself gripped in the mighty Hand of Jesus Christ, as my Savior and Lord. It was with such joy when some years later I heard that you and Treena also know this Savior and Lord. I know that He walks beside you and your family just now, that He will continue to minister to your grieved and broken soul. Know that many are praying for you, myself included, and rest in Him – one day at a time.
    Much love through Him,
    Annamaria and John Catanzaro

  17. D'Ann Says: 3:16 pm

    Dear Graham…

    no words….only love and prayers from the ground to God…

  18. Anita Griggs Says: 3:15 pm

    I appreciate your willingness to blog your way upstream. I (we) will be the beneficiaries of your insights.

  19. Michael Says: 2:57 pm

    For some reason your story of conversion always affected me. When I read your book and saw that testimony (or actually, I heard your testimony and then read your book), As a Christian it stood out rather nicely. Because I came to know the Lord almost directly because of my girlfriend at that time. Her name is the same onl,y the spelling is different.

    She is the love of my life, still, only I didn’t get to hold onto her. The world and its glitter, and bad people and other things, stole her away. Now I have spent a whole, entire lifetime, without her. Wishing. And I did not ever replace her either. I chose to remain single. For some reason I had this clear, ever present leading, to hold on and to wait. The promise was so near, I from minute to minute felt. Of this I was sure beyond earthly description, only, a lifetime has now passed, and I didn’t realize my hope. So it is warming to me, to see that you had a full life with yours. And I feel your pain. I have had a lifetime of it, though in a different way.

    I wish you didn’t have to go through missing her. Words just don’t help in that kind of situation. But I enjoyed your testimony a lot.

  20. Mel and Shirley Messina Says: 2:52 pm

    One more thing, the ones we miss we tend to have wonderful memories of and talk of often. Treena is a wonderful memory for us, our daughter Patricia was stunned and remembers Treena also. You are so special to so many of us we hold you dear and always have you in our prayers. God Bless.

  21. Mel and Shirley Messina Says: 2:35 pm

    You are so loved as well as Treena was, so this is just to say you are always in our prayers. We cherish the memoires as I know you do also of our time with Treena and you. Hugs and Loves.

  22. Kimbra Sargent Says: 2:14 pm

    I believe there will be smooth sailing upstream Thank you for sharing your grace

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